Going through a divorce is one of the hardest things that couples go through. However, if divorcing parents are what we are talking about, then the situation gets even harder. When parents go through a divorce, they simply do not have the luxury to do whatever they want. In the midst of all the pain they are going through, they still need to be a parent. Thus, here are 10 co-parenting tips for divorcing parents.
(10) Don’t bad mouth your ex-spouse.
“Your father has no balls!” You often here this from ex-wives who are still mad at their children’s fathers. Whatever your ex-husband did to you is addressed towards you, not your children. Never bad mouth your ex-spouse. He is different as a father and a husband.
(9) Don’t question their activities when they come from your ex.
Weekend visits are a must once parents are divorced. Don’t be too sceptic on what your kids have been doing over the weekend. You have to entrust your kids to your ex because they are still his children.
(8) Choose the people you date with.
Your back to being single and just can’t wait to date other people. However, since you already and parent, it would be best that you date someone who knows the situation is willing to treat your kids as their own.
(7) Focus on your kids.
This is the best time to keep your focus on your kids. You may not always see it but the divorce surely has an impact on them. So to avoid rebellion and bad behaviour, keep your eyes on them and provide enough time and care.
(6) Do not fight in front of your kids.
Fighting with your ex-spouse is the reason why you need to keep your contact to a minimum. There is no need to keep on fighting with your ex because you are still mad at them especially when your kids will see it. This will this remind them of the bad divorce the family went through.
(5) Do not uproot your children.
The changes brought about by divorce should only be between you and your spouse. Your children’s lives should remain stable. Never uproot them, move them to a new school, residence and the like. This will make the effects of the divorce worse on them.
(4) Do not bad mouth the new girlfriend or boyfriend of your ex-spouse.
Yes, you are jealous. But it becomes even funnier when you start bad mouthing the new date of your former spouse. Show that you are okay with it and be mature about it. Otherwise, you will be the one who will end up like a joke.
(3) Do not send messages to your former spouse by using your children.
If something needs to be settled or told, you need to tell it straight to your ex. Do not send messages through your children. This is stressful for them and you may not have any idea how much.
(2) Never show them how “messed up” you are.
Expect that there will be times that you will break down. You might find yourself wanting to have some booze or crying. Never show these to your kids no matter what.
(1) Always provide child support.
No matter how sticky the situation gets, always remember one thing – you are a parent first and a spouse, or should I say ex-spouse, second. Thus, even if you are really having a bad day with the divorce, when there is school play to attend, you go there with a smile and cheer for your kid.